What I’ve learned lately is that people are passionate about two things their political affiliations and which diet they are prescribing to at the moment (and a lot of other things, but these are the two people are really triggered to come after you for).  Keep in mind this isn’t an anti-diet diatribe, but it is a PSA that one diet does not fit all, and a personal statement in my lack of belief in commercialized diets for myself and how I arrived at this conclusion based on my own experiences.

I recently posted asking for new tips, tricks, and recipes and my comment on two popular diets was misconstrued to imply I was potentially thinking of trying one of them.  Let me clarify and do as this title implies, set the record straight, I have no problem with it if you do, but I do not believe in any singular commercialized diet plan.

Diets for me, symbolize negative thought processes that led to dangerous, disordered behaviors.  For some they may work. You may be that anomaly that can completely sell out and subscribe to certain eating restrictions and regulations for the rest of your life.  I am just not that human, and from my research and study of humans as a psychology major, the majority of humans don’t operate that way either. I can’t count points, carbs, and macros each and every day with the singular goal of staying within a five pound range of a specific weight for the rest of my life.  Strict diets only work when you are living in a majority state of restriction. That kind of obsession not only doesn’t work for me and my lifestyle but it is detrimental to me. Deviation of the acutest kind among most fad diets resulted in weight gain, and whatever line was laid out for me to walk by the fad diet of my choice cult leader at the time was often too straight and narrow for my wide hips to stay on for long without wavering.  Fast, immediate, and dramatic results are enticing, but as someone who has seen these results only to see the weight come roaring back like Cruella over the hill in a Coup de Ville (see picture below to reference my mental image of weight regain) carrying even more poundage along with it as soon as I move into the “maintenance phase”…that vicious fad diet cycle just no longer worked for me.

It created a pattern of thought that every time I ate anything not within my prescribed diet guidelines that I had failed.  The results on the scale of a “bad week” came with disappointed glances from women with clipboards who were so obviously superior to me because they were able to adhere to their designated number of points when I clearly couldn’t.  Why couldn’t I? Why did food have so much power over me that I simply couldn’t say no? How could I let one little cupcake or late night dinner flub my chance to lose a couple of pounds? I felt the need to punish myself the entire next week to atone for my diet sins.  I felt shame for prioritizing a social outing over a scale victory, and that shame often spiraled. Eating ice cream shouldn’t bring shame on me and my entire village.

That’s too much power.  My self-worth and who I am as a person should not be measured by one thing, the pull of gravity should not have that much gravity on my being.  I am bigger than that (pun intended). I was called by the Lord to be more than that. He didn’t say hey Ashley, you are only loved by me and by others if you stay within this weight range.  Me receiving a goal weight met chip from weight watchers is not my entry ticket into heaven, but by the way I have tied my concept of who I am as a person to it over the years, you would have thought it equated that in my mind.  It sounds dramatic, but I think many of us have been guilty of these self-sabotaging thought processes, they lend themselves to binge eating behaviors and a fear of all that isn’t “good diet” practices.  I just couldn’t do it anymore, of course I have to remind myself frequently that “Ashley you cannot do that anymore” and remind myself of what I can do.        

What I can do is listen to my body and make adjustments based on what it is telling me based on the fuel that I am putting into it.  I can be aware of what feels good to me versus what is good for me such as the temporary dopamine release I receive from consuming a snickers versus the long-lasting energy benefits of being well-hydrated from drinking enough water.   I can make adjustments when I see bad behaviors like using food as a coping mechanism, prioritizing convenience over nutrition, and minimizing the value of physical strength gained through exercise creep into my life again to correct the negative impact they have.  I can research one diet to understand how good fats like the ones from coconut oil and avocados can benefit my body’s functioning while still understanding from the research of another diet that the fiber from whole grains can benefit this as well. I can weed through the good information and recognize the red flags of fad diet restrictions that are not universally beneficial and therefore may not be beneficial to me.  Basically, I can understand that what robbing from Peter’s plate may actually pay Paul to eat, and to determine whether I am Peter or Paul, a little of both or not all.  I can see weight being lost by eating foods that are naturally lower in calories, and only eating them to the point of being satisfied not stuffed. I can enjoy the increased endurance of longer walks, faster swims, and more hours on the dance floor with friends from exercise.  I can even feel the emotional and mental clarity that comes from consuming things from the earth rather than things manufactured in a factory.  From all this I can see how food and exercise impact me personally and make my judgments based on the results I see as from those judgments.  

These things I can do, and when I am not doing them, now, because I am consciously aware of the difference I can get back to them when I deviate.  Not because it means I am a failure if I don’t. Not only because I want to look a certain way or weigh a certain amount (even though I still do).  It is because I want to feel better physically, mentally, and emotionally. Because what we put into our bodies and the energy we put out matters.  It isn’t about adhering to a diet it is about adhering to what is good for you.  Truly good for you.  

It’s about understanding your individual needs based on how your body is operating, and what fuels those good operations best versus what hinders those operations.  We all have different needs and one diet doesn’t fit all, but one commitment to finding out what your optimum health looks like does.

So don’t subscribe and sell out to one singular diet, if like me that doesn’t work for you, but if you have seen the benefits to your health from one singular diet.  Do it. Just don’t shame others because they aren’t or because they are. Be honest with yourself, be mindful of how your body feels, and educate yourself about what your body needs and wants to feel your best versus just what you want or others want so you can best fit one mold.  When break from that desire to only fit one mold, when you learn to distinguish your best health reality from a fad diet mentality, you will begin making a step in the direction of a lifestyle change for overall better health rather than a diet tied to the singular goal of weight loss.  Don’t give power to a numerical value, an image in a mirror, or your ability to only eat foods from certain groups. Give power to gaining strength, energy, and vitality back into the heart and bones that drive your day to day interactions with others and powers you to be a source of good energy and positive action in this world. We only have one temple, make it a good one so that it can house light and love for Him, you, and other for His purpose not for your vanity.  I’m slowly but surely learning and re-learning this every day, and while I don’t believe in a diet, I do believe in this mindset.

Stay healthy my friends!

XOXO,

Ashley Caylor